Yes, a pimple. There is no limit to what teenagers today will do to get rid of one. Everything from not drinking milk to Easy Off and steel wool have been employed in this timeless battle. Still, pimples manage to survive and show their ugly faces at the most inopportune time, usually on the night your girlfriend's parents are out of town.
Mr. Pimple
Every day millions of teenagers use an endless variety of assorted creams, cleansers, and sterilizing lotions to combat their one common enemy. A villian so terrible that teenagers have been battling him for hundreds of years. He is the ever-infamous MR. Pimple.
However, recently many teenagers have rediscovered an ancient method that has proven itself effective throughout hundreds of years of zit extermination
Yes, pimple-popping is gaining new popularity in front of millions of bathroom mirrors! And not just bathrom mirrors, either. The experienced pimple-popper can perpetrate a popping in a well polished chrome bumper, or in the rear-view mirror just before picking up his date.
It's not hard to understand why teenagers are turning back to this time-proven method. It is the only extermination technique that is reliable, safe, and inexpensive. When a pimple is properly popped it is as good as dead. When using some commercial product the outcome is never so certain. Will the offending zit go away, or will there be an allergic reaction, leading to an even worse condition? Will the medication dry the skin, leading to nose dandruff? And what if you should get it on your mucous membranes? Will you go blind? Will you never smell a rose again? And what about farts?
Using the simple technique of applying proper pressure at the proper time and place, the outcome is completely predictable; first, slight pain, then the pain intensifies as increasing pressure turns the offending blemish an angry re. Suddenly, PPPPPPHT!! It's all over. Another one bites the dust. Daub off the blood, wipe the goodie off the mirror, and you're as good as new!
The best thing about popping your own pimples is that it costs nothing. The money you would have used on that little teeny bottle of Oxy-10 can be spent on the things teenagers really want, such as more downloads for your Ipod, drugs, booze, ringtones for your celphone, or maybe Compound W to eradicate that big ugly wart on your chin with the big black hair growing out of the center. But that's another webpage.
So get with it, teens of America! Take aim and SQUEEeeEEZE!!
You'll be glad you did.
